Poem: Loneliness

It is the last day of loneliness.

All my hopes and dreams are coming to true.

I get to wake up to you and see the rays of life that has bless you.

You smile will be my alarm, and you laugh will keep me warm.

The hours are ticking by, and I can feel you creeping up next to me.

It is feeling that I never want to leave.

It is a way of life that I have only dream.

Could this be, could my destiny finally be fulfilled.

The hours and minutes keep disappearing.

The day I have wanted to share with someone is upon us.

Now if only this was not a dream.

Then it would be perfect.

Sadly, it is, the loneliness resides still in my heart.        

This is the day that my cut only grew deeper.

The day you left me, and loneliness became my way of life.

I have it all, yet I have nothing.

I wish you would come back, but sadly you want.

I guess it on to the next day of loneliness.

Unpretty waterfalls

The last couple of days I have been listen to a lot of TLC music, mostly two songs Waterfalls and Unpretty. I do not know why, but these songs have just been speaking to me more and more lately. The words to the songs seem like they are talking directly to me. I am at a point in my life where I am chasing something that I do not need to be doing, and I am not doing them the right way.

The part about the song Waterfalls, is that I have listen to the song for over 20 years, but this year I am listening to what they are saying. I have things that I want to do, but I am not listening to what people are telling me. I am going out and doing them on my own, and I am getting lost among the water. This is not the thing that I should do.

When it comes to unpretty, I do know why I just do not want to say. The answers are right in my face, but me being the person that I am, I just cannot say. I am too afraid to say what is on my mind, but I think I need to. This song speaks to so many people and over the years it has spoke to me. The lyrics about feeling that you are not good, and you look to things to make you feel better, but you do not you only feel worse. My whole life I have just never felt good about myself. I just always felt unworthy, and with everything that is coming up the next couple of weeks is making things worse.

I am working on me and that is all that I can do and even ask for, these are just the songs that are speaking to me and my soul. I am not perfect and do not want to be. I just want to be me and to be happy.