It holds everything, but not everything.
The secret conversation in the dark, the heart ache of two lovers drifting apart.
This place was special, yet I barely can remember what it looks like.
I just remember the things that happen there.
The way it made us feel as stood on its grounds.
It was not a home; it was just a room.
The room where the family would meet, the room where they would part.
It could not hold heat or air, yet it was full of it year-round.
It was not always there; it was something added on as the family started to grow.
It was the bed for some of us, it was the dance rehearsals for most.
The place that gave us hope, but also showed us everything is temporary.
It gave us grief, over the dead.
It saw us cry as we try to heal the broken parts of our body not could not quite heal.
It brought us to together as it was slowing tearing us apart.
This was not just a room; this was our room.
This was the den.
My mind is open, but it is not free.
My heart is broken, but it is not shattered.
My love is real, but no longer here.
My strength is weaking, but my soul is on fire.
My anger is real, but my hatred is gone.
My doubt is selfless, but my giving will never change.
I have tried all that I can to be me, but me is no longer working.
I do not know any other to be, but I know me is just not enough.
I thought I was going to be whole by now, but I am just as broken as ever.
Will my life ever change, will my love ever stop being ignored.
The answers are not giving at the best, but the rest is what we need.
I cannot give an answer to the you, but can you give one to me.
Is what I am doing in vain, but just my pain.
I could just be too open and broken to know, but I have to find the reason for being.
Another week and more thinking that I have been doing, or at least trying to do. There is so much going on and nothing going on at the same time, that I do not know what is going on sometimes. I have no room to complain. Has anyone made decision and thought about was it the right one? That is what I am going through right now. I must make a choice and I think I made one, but I am not sure it is correct.
The choice I made is something I do not want to make, but it is one that is needed now. I do not think that I am ready for what is about to happen, and I am scared to find out the outcome. I like to play it safe, but I know I must make a tough choice if I want to succeed in life. Only time will tell, I guess.
The wind is moving the tress.
The sun is hiding the moon.
The storm is coming, and I cannot move.
I just stand in the middle looking from left to right.
I do not know what I see. I just cannot move.
Everything starts to go blur for a while, and the only thing I see are faces.
The faces of friends, enemies, and lovers.
As I stand there surrounded by all, everything starts to fade away.
The faces are disappearing, and my heart is leaving with them.
I used to hate them, but now I realize that I miss them.
They are apart of me, but I know that they can no longer be.
We have to part, and they my hearts open.
My confusion becomes clear.
I am becoming me.
I have been working on something the last couple of months that I am very excited to share. I cannot say anything yet, but this is something I have wanted for a long time.