There you are I have not seen you in a while.
How is the light treating?
Is it everything you want, is it showing you your dream?
Do not let me get in your way, this is what you have always wanted.
You have wanted the love that was around, but you never could find.
The things that seemed so wrong have always made you right.
Then what happen you lost it all.
You realize the hopes are for the ones that likes to dream.
That was never you and now you are back with me.
We meet again this time it is not for fun.
This time it will last.
Forever is a while.
The pain is here is stay, and this time you will pay.
So, darkness are you there?
So much pain, but not enough tears to cry.
I do not know where to begin, this is not expected.
Could this be true or is this déjà vu.
Time is not on your side it only let you down.
The more I try to wish it away, the more the pain pulls me back.
This world belongs to you, and all the dreams you dream.
The sand in the hourglass has almost run out.
We got to get this thing right, before it stops.
I try not to cry, but the tears always show up at my door.
The more I resisted the more they break the door down.
Who am I without you?
Is this the night that my nightmares come true?
Our love no longer stands tall, and the walls have started to fall.
I need to go, but my feet would move.
My love is leaving and this time it is not with you.
I do not know what to do but walk not run from you.
That way I can hold onto all that I can from you.
As you walk out my way.
The last two weeks I came up with an idea that I would like to pursue. I am not sure that it will work out, but this is something to keep me being more creative. These last few months have been crazy for me with writing, and life in general. There is so much going on with my mind, that I am not sure if I it all makes sense to me.
The one constant thing I must say that has stayed the same is that I would like to be a writer. I want to be able to tell stories, not just any stories I want to tell my stories. My mind is always running, and it is never stopping. I do not want it to stop if I am honest. I just do not know how much more I need to do.
Last year I set a goal for me to write a screenplay, and you know what I did it. Was it easy, no? I set the goal and I accomplished. The truth is I have not looked at that since at least march. I know I need to go back and edit it, but I just cannot go back to it. If I am honest the reason I have not gone back to is because I do not trust me, and I never think anything that I do is good. I know it is good, but I tend to change almost everything when I go back over it.
I am just my own worst critic. If everyone around me tells me what I am writing is good. I just think they are making it up. It is something that I am working on, but it will take time. Maybe my new idea will be the push I need to keep going. Who knows, but you must just do it, do not worry about if this good or not just do it.
The storm is here.
The lighting and thunder scare me.
Yet I cannot run from it.
There is something about it that draws me.
The wind is blowing everything from around.
Things that have given me joy are no longer there.
As they pass me by, I do not reach out to help.
I cannot even say their names.
Once the winds stop, so does my yearning for them.
The rain is coming harder then I have ever heard before.
I am not scared; the hard sounds calm me.
As other run and hid, I just sit and listen as it drowns out their screams.
Once it stops, I can no longer hear, and I do not care to look for them.
The storm has come and gone, and now I am at peace.
My heart is no longer in pain, yet I still cannot fell anything.
I should be happy, but all I have are tears.
This was all I ever wanted, and now what.
Is this the end?
I am lost, ad I do not know where to find the answers.
I do not know where I want to go, or if I should.
I always thought this was my dream, but I am no longer dreaming it.
I no longer crave it.
It is quickly turning into my nightmare.
I no longer go to sleeping wishing I were living in that world.
This is no longer a test; this is a reality, and I must get to moving.