Old/New

It is a new year and time to start reflecting on the things that happen the last year. 2021 was a year of change and growth. It was a year where I finally decided to step outside my comfort zone and try something that I never would imagine. There were difficulties, but that is everything with life.

The year started off with me feeling accomplished. I had just finish writing my first movie script and started thinking about being a writer more. I have not really written another script like that since, but I did decide to just write something everyday and post it. I know most time it is not perfect, but I was writing that was the most important part. That is something I am working on is proofreading. I hate to do. I always end up hating what I wrote and start over.

The year also started the last couple with me not being happy at my job. I knew I needed to make a change, I just did not know how or if I could do it. Then one day I made a choice to quit and leave without any backup plans at all. I did not have a job lined up, I just knew that it was time for me to go and spread my wings. I was losing me and just working. I did and now I am sort of not losing me anymore. This is journey, but I am taking it.

This was the first time that I did not have anything plan or something to do since before I graduated high school in 2009. Something about me is that I do not know how to slow down. I have a need to constantly stay working. There is a fear in the back of my head, that if I take a break, I might lose something. I was once broke, and that is something that I refused to go through again.

The summer was just me working almost everyday about 2 hours away from my house, but you know something I was happy to not be the one in control. I had been the boss for so long that I needed a break from just everything. I also moved at the end of the summer, to place that has become special to me. I finally done something nice for me. Doing all this there is something I did not do. I did not write a single thing. I did write poetry, but that comes naturally to me.

The rest of the year went dark. I work every day, and then by the end of the year my last grandparent died. My grandmother died two days before the new year. The year that started off with a bunch of hopes in dreams, ended with losing a loved one. That is why you can never take anything for granted. You must work like it is your last day. I am starting this year off with hope for the future. The past happens for reason. It was a lesson for me to grow, and I did.

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